1.27.2011

child to mother.

Most days I'm able to get by without her. I don't go a day without thinking about her, but I manage to get by. But today, I wanted her. I wanted to hear her voice, I wanted to ask for advice. I wanted her to make me laugh by mispronouncing something. I wanted her to tell me how cute her grandchildren were. I wanted her to come over and reminiscence about the white hutch we bought together years ago, that now sits with Green Depression inside it. I wanted to see how her beauty has grown with age. (But she will be forever 48 in my head.)

It's been a hard couple of days and I needed my mom. 

We don't ever stop needing our moms.



Me and my mama when I was around 18 months


And right when I thought I was going to lose it today because I didn't have my mom right there for me, Audrey came and comforted me with her treasured blankie. A hug. And she told me without me saying anything, you're a good mama.

[Children can just sense emotions, can't they? It's really amazing.]

There are no words when you can find comfort in your children.

From child to mother and mother to child.

6 comments:

Morgan said...

Oh Abra, I'm so sorry. You're right, we don't ever stop needing our moms. What a precious girl to come comfort her mom, though.

I read your last post and I can so relate. It's been a tough week for me, too.

Lenae said...

It must be so hard, the wanting and not being able to have ... see ... hear. I'm glad you have such sweet girls of your own to hold when it gets rough.

swonderful said...

abra, i wish i knew the right thing to say. you have a lot of special girls in your life, and your mom is one of them. she'll always part of your life, even though she isn't physically here, right here, for you to have. and she passed on so much to the girls of your family... so many girls! she is still there.

kaitlin johnston said...

gosh. i cant even imagine. im honestly speechless. all i know is what i read on here and twitter and you seem like such an amazing mom and im sure you got that from your mom. im sure she couldn't be any happier and prouder! *hugs* and *prayers* :)

tippytoe foxtrot said...

I am absolutely sure your mom is watching over you with your sweet baby girls. And she is PROUD. You'll never stop missing your mom, but you hold on to all the beautiful memories you have and pull them out when you need them.

Sara Mac said...

Oh Abra, this made me cry. I found your blog a while ago and I enjoy reading it so much. I just had to leave a comment today to let you know I'm thinking about you. My heart breaks for you in moments like you described here. Your mom was amazing! I LOVED her laugh most of all:) {{{HUGS}}}